Tuesday, September 20, 2011

what was, a cosmic love.

and so it seems
that the crisp autumn nights
are when i’ll miss you the most,
and just when i thought i’d forgotten you
i realize, 
that the seconds i spend thinking of you
likely outnumber
all the stars in the sky,
and even the biggest planet
could never fill
the black hole
you’ve left
in my

Sunday, December 26, 2010

what it means to be free

You are free the moment you realize
you are enslaved by your own mind.
no one can save you,
but you.

Friday, November 12, 2010

A Winter Walk


We walk farther into the forest,
your cold hands touching the bare skin on my wrist.
I didn't ask you to join me but you came along
in that same proud way you always do.

Snow covers the forest floor, hiding all of the life that once
existed in this place. 

I look at you,
and again.

You gaze over at me and admire my pink flesh,
my sad gray eyes, and
the freckles you had never noticed before that day.

We walk farther still,
into the depths of snow and pine,
silence and ice
you whisper to me,
"I want to show you something, let me cover your eyes".

So I let you.
"Just a little farther now..."
Trustingly,  I walk blindly forward.

"Its here." 

Before us is the most curious tree, baring an array of red leaves
and offering only one lone fruit.
Standing side by side for a moment, we watch the harsh winds tear leaves from the tree;
leaving the ground covered in a blanket of crimson. 
You hold my hand.

We pick the fruit from the tangled limbs,
then lay, sleepily, in the snow.

"Its falling harder now" I whisper
as you take the first bite.
red juice spilling from your mouth and onto the 
frosty snow.

you look at me for a moment
and i glance timidly back at you
"it tastes sweet" you say.
I nod my head.

We position ourselves as if we were making snow angels,
hands touching hands, feet touching feet
our eyes slowly close,
then our mouths.

I peeked at you, again
just one last time,
though I could barely see you
beneath the snow that began to cover our
small bodies like a winter blanket.

I never loved you so much as I did that day.
And how badly I wish I would have told you.

An owl hovers above us
as we forget to breathe;
falling asleep beneath
the crimson tree.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010


Head against the wall
wishing for some tea or a cigarette
trying to think of anything but you,
miles away, talking cheerfully with friends
as i wander through this solemn place
uncomfortable and unable to speak any word but your name.
I run my fingers through my tangled hair, over my pale face
and I’m certain of only one thing now;
that loving a person is a lot like
hanging yourself.
But just before you jump
you look down at the ground,
back at the door.
You wait to see if someone
will come and rescue you.
But he doesn’t come.
No one comes.
He is settled beneath his sheets
probably dreaming
of a girl with softer skin and greener eyes,
a calmer voice.
But for what its worth,
all I really wanted
was for you to wrap your arms around me
and kiss me on the neck,
offer to make me an egg, some toast,
and maybe some tea.
That would be nice.

Monday, May 31, 2010


So you say you want to sleep?
Well sleep then, and be off!

The radiant brightness of the crescent moon
and the clusters of golden stars which freckle
the  face of the dark sky
will reveal themselves once more,
I'm sure of it.

Do not fret,
she will be back again tomorrow.
For the burning beauty 
of the universe, 
is eternal--

The golden sacred marks
speckled across the pale cheeks
of  God's fiery red haired mistress. 

He was always a sucker for those.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

a letter to you.

I saw your truth
with a child’s eyes
each plate thrown
 a bomb
an explosion
we were only civilians.

But all these years
This remains unquestioned:
How a mother,
If that’s what you would like to call it,
Could allow her children
To watch her
To meet death.

The reapers black eyes
Staring back at them
In pill form.

Perhaps you have just had enough.
Please forgive me if this is true
But as the war raged on
In this poor home
You’d forgotten
The casualties
You had taken with you.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Nipomo: for Donna-Lee

I still often sigh
as I think of our long gone, younger days--
where we'd play amongst the eucalyptus leaves
two sisters, untouched and unafraid.

We would jump off the moon--
pink umbrellas in hand
and back on the ground
safely we land.

Buried shoes
and porcelain dolls,
rainforest whispers and
high heels, much too tall.

This season is gone
and summer has lost its charm.
If I could turn back the clocks
I'd go back to the start-
a time where my sister
held my hand and
my heart.
Oh, sweet Nipomo.